Want you to know who I am
by Labyrinthofdeath
Summary: Lily/Scorpius song-fic. It's hard when you know what he's like but you want him anyway. But there is no stopping you after this moment, apart from his eyes and his touch, that electrify your pale skin.


We lie in his kingsized bed, his silk green sheets tangled around our sweaty, exhausted bodies.

With my hazel eyes focused on the ceiling, his one hand raked through my knotted cherry waves, as his other holds the lipstick covered cigarette while he puffs out the grey smoke.

My head rests on his chest as his breathing slows after our orgasms. He groans softly as I move my leg and arm over him, brushing against his once hard cock.

And I feel like I'm in a fantasy, in heaven, as you pull me back down when I sigh to leave, like all the girls have before me.

Because I know how you are, shag and forget, but right now, your here with me. And you don't want me to leave.

And I don't want to leave.

Because this could be my only chance, and it's my choice.

And I don't ever want to leave.

As I close my eyes, it's there.

The moment, it surrounds me, taking over my senses.

I can smell, taste, watch, hear you.

Everything but know what is locked in your mind.

All I feel is your breathe on my skin as your arms tighten around me, a crease between your eyebrows.

Are you as conflicted as me?

You'll move on as soon as leave, another notch on your bedpost. The most famous maybe?

I mean the only Potter on the post. But you, you'll forget me.

The experience will leave your memory.

But as my life moves on, I'll miss you.

You never leave my memory.

And I don't want to miss you tonight.

And I hide away from the world.

Hide from the 'perfect' life.

The life everyone thinks I have, leaving the profit to find someone else to bug as I close the door to my penthouse.

Closing out the world.

Because no one will understand, as the tears roll down my cheeks, making my mascara smudge down my face.

You've moved on, engaged now thanks to your pompous father.

Not that you'd have tried to stop him from a one night stand.

And now I'm broken, I can't sleep, or eat. My body wastes away as I watch you and your fiancé shop for wedding needs.

It's all over the prophet, and the mysterious disappearance of me, as I stay behind the comfort of my surrounding walls.

The walls that will keep our story.

I just want you to see me.

I just want to see you.

I just want you to remember me.

I just want you to know me.

The tears stop, but the trace of them is still visible, as they latch permanently to my blotchy raw cheeks.

I remember when you told me you loved me.

And I was stupid enough to believe you.

Even though the only time you said it was after you finished.

After you had your run of my body.

It felt like I was in heaven again, like a love movie, where a girl falls a guy who she believes she can change, especially after he asks her out.

But it was a lie, like a romantic movie which fell off the rails.

The one that doesn't follow the rules.

That killed people as it crashed to the ground and blew up in front of the young girl who believed in love.

As I cut, the blood pours out.

The red liquid takes over the cream tiles of my shower as I collapse in tears thinking of you.

And I hid away from the world.

Hid from the 'perfect' life.

The life everyone thinks I have.

But I face the world once more, with my head down.

Still trying to block out the world around me.

Because no one will understand, as the tears roll down my cheeks, making my mascara smudge down my face.

No one will understand what you did to my heart.

I'm still broken, I can't sleep, or eat. My body limp even as I watch you and your fiancé row in front of the cameras.

It's all over the prophet, as well as the first viewing of me in 2 months.

I just want you to see me.

I just want to see you.

I just want you to remember me.

I just want you to know me.

_And I don't want the world to see me_

The world around me is in colour as I stand in grey.

With you.

Like the colour of _your_ eyes.

But grey all the same.

I'm split from the world.

Because the world I live in, doesn't need to see me.

Because they don't understand me, or my interests with the Malfoy 'scum'.

Because we are so wrong for each other it's _right_.

My mother and father look scared and confused as I enter the manor.

No hiding now.

Because I need to live my life.

I need to get over you.

Because I want to be fixed, no matter how tattered I am.

I need to you know who I am, I need you to fix me because your the one who tore me up.

Who knocked me down.

And I need you know who I am.

_I want you to know who I am._

As I start to evolve, to break out of the shell I was forced into after our night together.

You came back.

'I like you.' You tell me,as you run your hand through your blonde hair, mussing it even more. 'I couldn't marry her.'

'Fucking liar.' I scream back at you, it's been 11 months.

As all my anger from the nights following come back as fast as you can apparate.

'No, Lil, I'm serious!' He exclaims.

Making the people around us in the lobby of my hotel penthouse watch us with huge eyes and shocked faces.

'I have no need for you anymore!'

I shout back, throwing my arms up, exposing my grazed stomach.

'What the fuck is that?'

He exclaims his hands moving carefully towards the scars.

I pull away, crossing my arms, covering where ever I can.

'Fuck you.' I cry, tears rolling silently down my cheeks. 'Its your fault anyway!'

'Lils, I'm sorry!' But that's enough. I need to leave. I cant do this no matter how much butterflies gathered in my stomach as his hands over lap mine.

* * *

If you like it you should.

A) Review

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C) B


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